World War 2 fascinates me. It is the clearest picture I can think of that represents good verse evil. It stirs heroism inside me. It also disgusts me. The utmost inhumanity probably occurred during that time under the Nazi Regime.
Anyway, as I watched a WW2 documentary on Sunday evening an interesting thought came to my mind. I thought: "My grandparents fought the Depression and World World 2. My Parents fought Communism, racism, sexism, and inequality in general." Then I thought, "what is my generation fighting? What is the War of our Epoch?"
Is it terrorism? Poverty? Underdevelopment? AIDS? Human Trafficking? Global Warming? Or I wonder... is it something much closer to home; something much more stealth-like?
Is the War of our Epoch the same as every other generation's battle, but does it just look different? My conclusions is this: Yes, the War of our Epoch is all that is mentioned above and more. But the true Battle is within ourselves. It's the Battle against Me-ness.
Me-ness is a sneeky enemy. It takes many forms and changes frequently; but it has one characteristic that remains constant no matter what the shape it takes: the desire to care for oneself, and only oneself. Me-ness is apathy, pride, selfishness, lust, gluttony, gossip, laziness, busyness, cynicism, legalism, etc. Anything that keeps us in Me-mode. The excuse typically looks like this, "I'm too ______ to _______ right now." I'm to tired, I'm to busy, I'm too important, etc.
Me-ness is the true cause behind all the Epoch Wars that have existed. Me-ness is the cause of terrorism, poverty, underdevelopment, AIDS, human trafficking, and every other problem you can think of. At the heart of every evil is Me-ness, and guess what? We've all contracted the disease. That's why this is the true Battle of our time. If we can win the Battle, we can win the War.
Let me know what you guys think. I want to hear your thoughts on the post as a whole and on the issue as a whole. What do you think the true problem and solution is? I'm not going to proof read so I apologize if there are typos or any other grammatical errors.
December 1, 2009
March 11, 2009
Unexpected Freedom
For the past 9 months or so I have been suffering from depression. I would cry nearly everyday; generally for no reason at all, I just needed to cry. I constantly felt like I wanted to withdraw from friends, family, and activities that I once found enjoyable. I lost nearly every ounce of passion that I had for life and Jesus. I felt like I was crumbling. I felt like I was being held together by a an unraveling rope. I felt like I was surrounded by darkness at all times. I was in a deep, dark pit of self-destruction.
I finally decided to receive help after many friends recommended professional care. My counselor advised that I begin taking anti-depressants, so I did. I've been on anti-depressant medication for nearly 3 weeks now and I have noticed significant differences. When I wake up in the morning I feel like myself; something I haven't felt in months. As much relief this medication has brought me, it is not the source of freedom I have experienced. My freedom came from a highly unlikely candidate: my mom.
My mom and I have never seen eye to eye, especially after I met Jesus and decided to follow Him. My mom is not afraid to tell anyone what she thinks. If she thinks you are annoying, she will tell you. If she thinks you need to lose weight, she will tell you. Of course, my sister and I have been reminded of our shortcomings quite a few times. Don't get me wrong, my mom isn't heartless or callous, she just lacks a filter. Growing up I was very self conscious of my weight because my mom would continually judge my body and inform me if I was up to par or not. In few words, my mom always told me that I needed to be better than I was.
When I decided to get professional help for my depression, I purposefully did not inform my mom. I was afraid of what she would think and say. Eventually, God prompted me to reveal my secret to her.
I came clean over the phone and told her that I was taking medication and seeing a counselor. To my relief (and surprise) she was calm and collected. She didn't freak out at all! We talked for a while about what was going on in my life and somehow we got on the subject of how I don't think I am good enough (I had no idea my mom knew I struggled with this lie). Apparently she read something that I had written and left in the open. She continued to tell me that I was smart enough. I was pretty enough. I was good enough. For the first time in my life my mother affirmed me as her daughter. For the first time I was enough as I currently was. I didn't need to lose weight, wear more make-up, earn better grades, or try harder. In my pitiful and dark place I was enough for her.
I never realized how much I needed her affirmation until it came. I know this was all Jesus. He healed a deep wound in my heart through my atheist mother. How great you are, Lord! God had compassion on me in my incredibly frail state. Glory, Glory Hallelujah!
I finally decided to receive help after many friends recommended professional care. My counselor advised that I begin taking anti-depressants, so I did. I've been on anti-depressant medication for nearly 3 weeks now and I have noticed significant differences. When I wake up in the morning I feel like myself; something I haven't felt in months. As much relief this medication has brought me, it is not the source of freedom I have experienced. My freedom came from a highly unlikely candidate: my mom.
My mom and I have never seen eye to eye, especially after I met Jesus and decided to follow Him. My mom is not afraid to tell anyone what she thinks. If she thinks you are annoying, she will tell you. If she thinks you need to lose weight, she will tell you. Of course, my sister and I have been reminded of our shortcomings quite a few times. Don't get me wrong, my mom isn't heartless or callous, she just lacks a filter. Growing up I was very self conscious of my weight because my mom would continually judge my body and inform me if I was up to par or not. In few words, my mom always told me that I needed to be better than I was.
When I decided to get professional help for my depression, I purposefully did not inform my mom. I was afraid of what she would think and say. Eventually, God prompted me to reveal my secret to her.
I came clean over the phone and told her that I was taking medication and seeing a counselor. To my relief (and surprise) she was calm and collected. She didn't freak out at all! We talked for a while about what was going on in my life and somehow we got on the subject of how I don't think I am good enough (I had no idea my mom knew I struggled with this lie). Apparently she read something that I had written and left in the open. She continued to tell me that I was smart enough. I was pretty enough. I was good enough. For the first time in my life my mother affirmed me as her daughter. For the first time I was enough as I currently was. I didn't need to lose weight, wear more make-up, earn better grades, or try harder. In my pitiful and dark place I was enough for her.
I never realized how much I needed her affirmation until it came. I know this was all Jesus. He healed a deep wound in my heart through my atheist mother. How great you are, Lord! God had compassion on me in my incredibly frail state. Glory, Glory Hallelujah!
July 14, 2008
Upside Down Kingdom
God really likes to do things backwards, according to our world's standards, anyway. I mean love your enemies? Take a day off? Your power is made perfect in weakness? Whoa Jesus, I think you should lie down and put a very cold rag on your head because you are trippin'.
Truth is I don't understand much of what Jesus says. Most of the time it leaves me scratching my head with a dumbfounded look on my face saying, "Huh?". But I have discovered that life is much better backwards, Jesus style.
I've learned that its easy to hate my enemies, but that it takes true courage to love them instead. I've learned that what this world views as backwards, really isn't backwards at all. What seems to be backwards is truthfully more fulfilling and good. Its the world that is backwards, upside down, messed up, and trippin'.
So, when things seem messed up and insane, maybe God is looking down at it and saying, "Yeah, this fits well together." Maybe you won't see just how well it fits together until later, possible wayyy later. But that's ok. It still fits well together, so don't worry, you've got the God of the universe on your side.
Truth is I don't understand much of what Jesus says. Most of the time it leaves me scratching my head with a dumbfounded look on my face saying, "Huh?". But I have discovered that life is much better backwards, Jesus style.
I've learned that its easy to hate my enemies, but that it takes true courage to love them instead. I've learned that what this world views as backwards, really isn't backwards at all. What seems to be backwards is truthfully more fulfilling and good. Its the world that is backwards, upside down, messed up, and trippin'.
So, when things seem messed up and insane, maybe God is looking down at it and saying, "Yeah, this fits well together." Maybe you won't see just how well it fits together until later, possible wayyy later. But that's ok. It still fits well together, so don't worry, you've got the God of the universe on your side.
July 7, 2008
The sacredness of nakedness
Labels:
Sex
So, I'm 19, I follow Jesus, and I love thinking about sex. Some of you just came to a screeching stop and are probably saying, "What the foo daddy did she just say?!" Well its true, I like thinking about sex. Let me clarify: I like thinking about sex the way God intended us to experience it.
God intended us to enjoy sex within the confines of marriage. Sex is one of the greatest gifts from the Lord. Think about it ladies. Bearing your all to a man who wants nothing more than to show you just how wonderfully beautiful you are to him. To be pursued whole heartedly and purely. Think about it guys. To exhibit your God-given strength to a woman that wants you to take her. To be as one, to sweep her off her feet. Sex is at it's apex when it is between two people who have vowed to love each other in sickness and in heath as long as they both shall live. Sex is most pleasurable when it is between two people who have remained pure.
This is where my heart is saddened. There is no one on the planet that has managed to stay sexually pure, except Jesus, of course. By sexually pure I don't necessarily mean in a physical sense. I mean it in all aspects of the word. If a person has thought about another person in an inappropriate way, they have tarnished their purity. If a person has looked at porn, they have damaged their purity. If a person has masturbated, they have stained their purity. And of course, if a person has had sexual relations with someone else, they have defiled their purity (I don't mean kissing, I mean anything beyond. But for some people kissing is no bueno). We have all marred this precious gift of purity. We have all blemished the sacredness of nakedness.
So where do we go from here? Does this mean that the sex we experience with our future (or current) spouse will not be beautiful or electrifying? Absolutely not! God is so good that he still allows us to discover this gift. So what do we do now? We live, we love, we forgive, and never give up (I can't believe I just quoted superchick). We live on, pursuing Jesus, holiness, and purity. We love those who are on the road of sexual destruction and help heal those who are wounded from it. We forgive our future partner for the way they have mishandled their purity, as they forgive us of the same and we forgive those who have taken purity from us. We never give up, but continue to trust that God is good and that he will lead you to good places and give you good gifts.
So get excited about wholesome, dirty, enrapturing sex with your spouse someday.
God intended us to enjoy sex within the confines of marriage. Sex is one of the greatest gifts from the Lord. Think about it ladies. Bearing your all to a man who wants nothing more than to show you just how wonderfully beautiful you are to him. To be pursued whole heartedly and purely. Think about it guys. To exhibit your God-given strength to a woman that wants you to take her. To be as one, to sweep her off her feet. Sex is at it's apex when it is between two people who have vowed to love each other in sickness and in heath as long as they both shall live. Sex is most pleasurable when it is between two people who have remained pure.
This is where my heart is saddened. There is no one on the planet that has managed to stay sexually pure, except Jesus, of course. By sexually pure I don't necessarily mean in a physical sense. I mean it in all aspects of the word. If a person has thought about another person in an inappropriate way, they have tarnished their purity. If a person has looked at porn, they have damaged their purity. If a person has masturbated, they have stained their purity. And of course, if a person has had sexual relations with someone else, they have defiled their purity (I don't mean kissing, I mean anything beyond. But for some people kissing is no bueno). We have all marred this precious gift of purity. We have all blemished the sacredness of nakedness.
So where do we go from here? Does this mean that the sex we experience with our future (or current) spouse will not be beautiful or electrifying? Absolutely not! God is so good that he still allows us to discover this gift. So what do we do now? We live, we love, we forgive, and never give up (I can't believe I just quoted superchick). We live on, pursuing Jesus, holiness, and purity. We love those who are on the road of sexual destruction and help heal those who are wounded from it. We forgive our future partner for the way they have mishandled their purity, as they forgive us of the same and we forgive those who have taken purity from us. We never give up, but continue to trust that God is good and that he will lead you to good places and give you good gifts.
So get excited about wholesome, dirty, enrapturing sex with your spouse someday.
July 6, 2008
Fingerprints
Labels:
fingerprints
Fingerprints.
We all have them; they are unique to us. So, what's the big deal? Are they just some mark that God thought it would be cool for us to have? No. They are more than tiny imprints on the tips of our fingers and toes. They symbolize our individuality, our incomparable, inimitable identities in Christ.
Our fingerprints contain our special gifts, talents, desires, dreams, passions, personalities, and whatever else you can think of. Just like our fingerprints are each our own, so are our gifts, talents, desires, dreams, passions, personalities, etc. No one else is exactly like you or me. Sure, people do have similar gifts. I know lots of people who are blessed with the gift of wisdom, but that does not make them one in the same. They have different types of wisdom and they use their wisdom in different ways.
God has given us these gifts for a reason: to leave a mark. God has given us our fingerprints to further his Kingdom. God wants to leave his mark on the world through the gifts he has given us. All we have to do is use them, that's it! There is no catch, no loop hole.
One way Jesus has asked me to leave a mark on eternity this summer is to be a light to my family. He told me that "my light will rise in the darkness and my family's night will become like noon day" (Isaiah 58). He also told me how: "let your light shine before men so that they may see your good deeds and praise your Father in Heaven" (Matthew 5:16). This is hard for me, it makes me feel uncomfortable. This means I have to let my parents see who I really am. This means I have to share my heart with them, which I have kept hidden from them for so long. This means I have to spend precious time with them. This means sacrificing nights with friends to spend time with the people who raised me, but never really knew me. This means I can't be selfish anymore; I must be humbly bold.
Leaving fingerprints can be hard because you can't necessarily see them yourself. I guess this is where faith comes in. All I can do is trust that what the Lord prophesied will come true. And it will, as it always does. I will see my parents in Heaven one day. They will get to taste the freedom that only Christ can offer. It's only a matter of time now.
I've been commissioned to be a light to a dark and miserable world, and so have you. We are the light of the world. We are the body of Christ. We are God's plan for reconcilation. We are the only glimpse of hope for this lost and broken world. So, lets reach out and touch the leper.
We all have them; they are unique to us. So, what's the big deal? Are they just some mark that God thought it would be cool for us to have? No. They are more than tiny imprints on the tips of our fingers and toes. They symbolize our individuality, our incomparable, inimitable identities in Christ.
Our fingerprints contain our special gifts, talents, desires, dreams, passions, personalities, and whatever else you can think of. Just like our fingerprints are each our own, so are our gifts, talents, desires, dreams, passions, personalities, etc. No one else is exactly like you or me. Sure, people do have similar gifts. I know lots of people who are blessed with the gift of wisdom, but that does not make them one in the same. They have different types of wisdom and they use their wisdom in different ways.
God has given us these gifts for a reason: to leave a mark. God has given us our fingerprints to further his Kingdom. God wants to leave his mark on the world through the gifts he has given us. All we have to do is use them, that's it! There is no catch, no loop hole.
One way Jesus has asked me to leave a mark on eternity this summer is to be a light to my family. He told me that "my light will rise in the darkness and my family's night will become like noon day" (Isaiah 58). He also told me how: "let your light shine before men so that they may see your good deeds and praise your Father in Heaven" (Matthew 5:16). This is hard for me, it makes me feel uncomfortable. This means I have to let my parents see who I really am. This means I have to share my heart with them, which I have kept hidden from them for so long. This means I have to spend precious time with them. This means sacrificing nights with friends to spend time with the people who raised me, but never really knew me. This means I can't be selfish anymore; I must be humbly bold.
Leaving fingerprints can be hard because you can't necessarily see them yourself. I guess this is where faith comes in. All I can do is trust that what the Lord prophesied will come true. And it will, as it always does. I will see my parents in Heaven one day. They will get to taste the freedom that only Christ can offer. It's only a matter of time now.
I've been commissioned to be a light to a dark and miserable world, and so have you. We are the light of the world. We are the body of Christ. We are God's plan for reconcilation. We are the only glimpse of hope for this lost and broken world. So, lets reach out and touch the leper.
July 2, 2008
My favorite Christianese words
Christianese is, as defined by Urbandictionary.com, a communicable language within the Christian subculture with words and phrases created, redefined, and / or patened that applies only to the Christian sphere of influence.
I'd say thats pretty accurate. Not to say that any of these words don't have any value or true meaning, but they do sound ridiculous to people who don't understand or speak this language. I have to admitt that I'm guilty of speaking this language from time to time. I'm pretty sure almost every Christian has said some of these words during their life time. Here is a list of my favorites, in no particular order:
1. Born again
Now I know this is Biblical, but it does sound pretty weird... "You mean I have to go back in there and be born again?! Jesus, you wacko man!" Jesus is actually referring to be born of the spirit, which is of God. He does not mean another physical birth, that would be even weirder.
2. Calling
I'm caught red-handed with this one. "God's calling me into full time ministry" or "God calls us to love our neighbor". In the first example, a translation would be "My purpose (or God's plan) is for me to be doing full time ministry". In the second example, call could be replaced with commands, or holds us to the standard of (loving our neighbors).
3. Dry Season
Now here is a phrase I hope I NEVER use. Not for its meaning, but rather because it sounds stupid, but that's just my opinion. Basically all it means is that they were having a hard time with their faith or following the Lord. It could also mean that there was a period in their life where they could not hear or discern what He was saying, or calling them to, if you will ;).
4. Covered by the blood of Jesus
If I didn't speak Christianese and I heard someone say this, I'd call the cops. "Oh man, I'm just covered by the blood of Jesus!! Covered by the blood of Jesus? So you brutally killed him and now have blood splatted all over your face, ok then... 911. No, actually, this person did not physically kill Jesus. Their sin however, did put him on the cross. Ok first, you must understand that Jesus never did anything wrong, so therefore he was innocent. And since his blood was innocent, it is able to pay for all the wrong and crappy things people do. If you choose to accept this offering from God then you are 'covered by the blood of Jesus'. Also meaning you are forgiven by God of all your sins.
5. Die to yourself and pick up your cross
Ummmm, so Jesus is suggesting I commit suicide?? And after I kill myself I'm supposed to carry a large cross...but I'm dead soo that's not going to work out so well. Right. So, die to yourself means to choose to lay down your own desires/plans and to pick up your cross means to choose to follow Jesus and to choose his ways rather than your own. Yeah, this is tough. Oh yeah, just to clear things up, Jesus isn't an advocate for self mutilation or suicide. As usual it doesn't mean a physical death, but a spiritual death instead.
There are a bazillion others, but these are my fave five. I hope this clear some of this crazy language up. If you have any further questions on what these or other words could mean, shabang me! Let me know your most favorite and least favorite words in this language.
I'd say thats pretty accurate. Not to say that any of these words don't have any value or true meaning, but they do sound ridiculous to people who don't understand or speak this language. I have to admitt that I'm guilty of speaking this language from time to time. I'm pretty sure almost every Christian has said some of these words during their life time. Here is a list of my favorites, in no particular order:
1. Born again
Now I know this is Biblical, but it does sound pretty weird... "You mean I have to go back in there and be born again?! Jesus, you wacko man!" Jesus is actually referring to be born of the spirit, which is of God. He does not mean another physical birth, that would be even weirder.
2. Calling
I'm caught red-handed with this one. "God's calling me into full time ministry" or "God calls us to love our neighbor". In the first example, a translation would be "My purpose (or God's plan) is for me to be doing full time ministry". In the second example, call could be replaced with commands, or holds us to the standard of (loving our neighbors).
3. Dry Season
Now here is a phrase I hope I NEVER use. Not for its meaning, but rather because it sounds stupid, but that's just my opinion. Basically all it means is that they were having a hard time with their faith or following the Lord. It could also mean that there was a period in their life where they could not hear or discern what He was saying, or calling them to, if you will ;).
4. Covered by the blood of Jesus
If I didn't speak Christianese and I heard someone say this, I'd call the cops. "Oh man, I'm just covered by the blood of Jesus!! Covered by the blood of Jesus? So you brutally killed him and now have blood splatted all over your face, ok then... 911. No, actually, this person did not physically kill Jesus. Their sin however, did put him on the cross. Ok first, you must understand that Jesus never did anything wrong, so therefore he was innocent. And since his blood was innocent, it is able to pay for all the wrong and crappy things people do. If you choose to accept this offering from God then you are 'covered by the blood of Jesus'. Also meaning you are forgiven by God of all your sins.
5. Die to yourself and pick up your cross
Ummmm, so Jesus is suggesting I commit suicide?? And after I kill myself I'm supposed to carry a large cross...but I'm dead soo that's not going to work out so well. Right. So, die to yourself means to choose to lay down your own desires/plans and to pick up your cross means to choose to follow Jesus and to choose his ways rather than your own. Yeah, this is tough. Oh yeah, just to clear things up, Jesus isn't an advocate for self mutilation or suicide. As usual it doesn't mean a physical death, but a spiritual death instead.
There are a bazillion others, but these are my fave five. I hope this clear some of this crazy language up. If you have any further questions on what these or other words could mean, shabang me! Let me know your most favorite and least favorite words in this language.
June 22, 2008
fruit-bearin' branches!
My Mission (which I chose to accept) this summer was to "Shine my light before men [my family] so that they may see my good deeds and praise my father in Heaven" Matt 5:16. God has been so faithful in this endeavor. I've prayed, and He's answered. One thing he asked me to pray for was deeper relationships with my parents. Its been such a blessing to see this play out. The joy I've received from this calling is indescribable and untamable. By his Grace, I'm able to be more open and bold with my parents. I'm able to share pieces of my heart, which is something I have never been able to do before. My parents know that I love Jesus and that because of him, I'm able to love people.
My mom came to church a week ago (she hates church, so this was an incredible display of God's sovereignty and power!! Yay Jesus!). That Sunday just happened to be the day that Gary Haugen, the founder of International Justice Mission (IJM.org), was speaking. He spoke about all the things God has been doing through IJM and how God is good. He showed the congregation pictures and videos of some of the secret investigations they had operated. It was crazy stuff man! My mom got to see how passionately people sang to Jesus. Thank you, Lord, this was your good pleasure to reveal yourself to her through your people's good deeds!
After the service she got of the sanctuary in a hurry, as usual. She was very bothered by what she had heard and seen. She tried to hide her discopmfort, but she didn't do a very good job :). No, she wasn't saved that day. No, she didn't start to believe in a big God. And no, she didn't realize her brokeness. But she did see God's heart for the world. She did get to witness an undying, passionate worship. She did encounter the Lord that day. Praise Jesus! The snowball is gaining speed and size, and it's only a matter of time before her name is written the Book of Life. I cannot wait for that day! I'll be singing with the angels! Yahoo :D!
Holy, Holy, Holy,
Is the Lord God Almighty,
Who was and is and is to come
My mom came to church a week ago (she hates church, so this was an incredible display of God's sovereignty and power!! Yay Jesus!). That Sunday just happened to be the day that Gary Haugen, the founder of International Justice Mission (IJM.org), was speaking. He spoke about all the things God has been doing through IJM and how God is good. He showed the congregation pictures and videos of some of the secret investigations they had operated. It was crazy stuff man! My mom got to see how passionately people sang to Jesus. Thank you, Lord, this was your good pleasure to reveal yourself to her through your people's good deeds!
After the service she got of the sanctuary in a hurry, as usual. She was very bothered by what she had heard and seen. She tried to hide her discopmfort, but she didn't do a very good job :). No, she wasn't saved that day. No, she didn't start to believe in a big God. And no, she didn't realize her brokeness. But she did see God's heart for the world. She did get to witness an undying, passionate worship. She did encounter the Lord that day. Praise Jesus! The snowball is gaining speed and size, and it's only a matter of time before her name is written the Book of Life. I cannot wait for that day! I'll be singing with the angels! Yahoo :D!
Holy, Holy, Holy,
Is the Lord God Almighty,
Who was and is and is to come
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